Turnabout to losing the game
by Goldtiger
Summary: Apparently, our good ol' hero has been pulled into another Ultra mess, or to be more accurate, he's been pulled into nothing at all. Just read and find out. Oh, and before I forget...you just lost the game. R&R!
1. Chapter 1

**I wonder how ace attorneys react to losing in a game so easily...**

**April: All characters and rights belong to Capcom, not this kid, or like, I'd totally crush the little twerp if he owned us.**

**...**

_October 7__th__, 2009: Phoenix Wright and co._

"Hey Nick! Check out this game I found out about!"

It was a cold autumn day, and their office was going through its usual business day(or rather, no-business day), and as usual, Phoenix was sorting through his old records of previous trials while Maya was...well, being herself. At the mention of his name, the attorney turned around and gave a bored glance at the spirit medium.

"Maya, why are you using my computer to surf the net?"

"Gimme a break! I need SOME time to slack off! Work is stressing, you know?"

_Work? What work...?_

"Oh please! I bet that you sneak in a game of solitaire or two!"

_Says you._

"C'mon! Just look at this! It's called THE GAME."

"...what kind of name is that?"

"Well, it's hard to describe such an awesome thing! I mean, this gets like ten burgers out of ten!"

_You rank things using burgers??...oh wait, it's Maya._

"You see, it says that every person in this world plays the game, whether they are aware of it or not."

"Wow, isn't that convenient."

"Another sarcastic remark and I'll cut your salary in half!"

_You don't pay me! Besides, since when did you become my boss?_

Clearing her throat, Maya started to announce the rules of the game.

"Rule NUMBER ONE. Everyone is playing game, as I said earlier. Rule NUMBER TWO. You cannot win the game, for there is no way to win. Rule NUMBER THREE. If you think about the game in any way, you lose the game. However, you get a thirty-minute grace in which you can think about the game. After that, you are back in the game....and that's about it, Nick."

"A game in which you can't lose? Huh..."

"Hey, Nick! Guess what? We just lost the game!" (you knew it was coming)

Blinking, Nick condensed his rampant thoughts into one word. "Huh?"

"Yeah! You see, we were just talking about it right now, so that counts as losing the game since we're thinking about it too! Man, we suck at this game!"

_Wait, that's not fair..._

"Wow, this game is challenging! Nick, let's give it our best in half an hour!"

_Give our best to do what exactly?? _

Misunderstanding Phoenix's expression, she said "Hey come on, we may have dropped down to the bottom, but that means that it can't get any worse, right?"

"A game that you can't win, hm?"

Phoenix and Maya both turn towards the source of the voice, and there stood Miles Edgeworth, Ace Prosecutor, and now Silent Intruder.

With a deadpanned look, Phoenix asked,

"Since when did you get here?"

"About a minute ago, but that's beside the point. Where is your sense of hospitality? You could at least offer me a spot of tea."

_Why would I give people who sneak up behind me and invade my personal space a cup of tea?_

"For all you know, I could be a valuable client."

"Are you?" asked Maya.

"Certainly not."

_Then why are you here..._

Suddenly, he thrust his famous finger at Phoenix's face, declaring,

"I challenge you to the game! In the end, we shall see who is better!"

"You fools who foolishly think that you will foolishly win at this foolish game! I will be the victor, and I shall prove to all, most of all you, Phoenix Wright, that I am superior!"

_Wait, Von Karma? Did she just teleport into my office? _

"I sensed an opportunity to humiliate you, you fool."

_Why do I have the sudden urge to sing her name to the tune of the spiderman theme song?_

"Hey, I wanna join in too!" shouted Detective Gumshoe, who was apparently climbing through the window across the room.

_We're on the third floor! How did you climb up here??_

"I wanted to come in in a dramatic fashion..."

_The why's not important!_

SNAP

"OW!"

Scowling, Franziska shouted, "Don't act like such an idiot! You might damage the wall with your dense skull!"

_What a caring boss..._

"Agreed. Would you like another cut? You're already under the minimum-minimum wage" said Edgeworth.

_What a caring friend..._

Shaking his head, Maya butted into the conversation. "Hold it, you guys! How about this? Let's host a free-for-all! All we have to do is make the other person think about the game three times, and they lose! You can go for anyone, and the game stops when there's only one winner! I'll be the referee so I can announce the losers and winners. Contact me if someone loses or wins. Got it?"

All the heads in the room, minus the spiky one, nodded in unison. Then, as one, they all pointed their fingers at the lawyer in blue and shouted out:

"I SHALL DEFEAT YOU, PHOENIX!"

_Why am I playing!?_

**To be honest, I'm thinking of making this into a fairly long story. However, I want your feedback to see is this could be interesting enough. Anyways, rate and review. You do NOT know how important I think reviews are. So please just take a minute of your time and write a sentence. Heck, even a word will suffice! But, it's up to you. Until next time! **


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey guys, it's me again. Anyways, I'm actually surprised that people liked this. I mean, I wasn't expecting anything big considering that it was just a random idea I got from surfing wikipedia. :p Anyways, enjoy the second installment! Remember, R&R if you can! **

**Ace Attorney does NOT belong to me. However, I DO own this silly plot.**

"For the last time! Stop following me around like a stray dog!"

"But Mr. Edgeworth, humans need love too!"

"Shouldn't you be working overtime to make up for the money you lost, Detective Gumshoe!?"

At those words, the scruffy-looking detective flinched and pouted.

"Aw, but Mr. Edgeworth sir! I want to help you!"

Edgeworth sighed, stopped in his tracks, and turned around to stare at the miserable miscreant.

"Help? Who's the ace prosecutor here?"

"You are..."

"And who is the person who owns a red sports car here?"

"Wait, you what?"

"Answer me!"

"Y-you, I guess."

"And you are under the impression that I need YOUR help?"

"Hey, two heads are better than one, right?"

"Not if my head has to compensate for you and I."

Gumshoe sniffed.

"...Fine. You may help me. Although Wright is a blundering idiot at times, I cannot deny his talent for defending."

"Don't you mean talent for beating yo-"

"Another word and you'll have to sell that trench coat of yours just to pay your rent. Anyways, since he always has his assistant to help him, I believe that it is time to fight fire with fire."

"Huh? Whadda you mean?"

"For the purpose of winning, I hereby declare you as my assistant. I trust that you will do your part flawlessly?"

The detective's eyes brightened and saluted Edgeworth.

"I won't let you down, Mr. Edgeworth!"

Edgeworth nodded, and continued walking. With a thoughtful expression, he said:

"First, we need to devise a strategy, however, since we are beginners at this, I suggest that we collect some evidenc-I mean, information on this game...Gumshoe! Get out your laptop and find any tips on how to make others lose at this challenge."

Turning around, he pointed his finger at the burly man as he shouted out his first demands. Gumshoe hesitated for a second, then scratched the back of his head and looked away in embarrassment, his eyes suddenly focusing on a hideous stain on his coat.

"Uh, well, you see, I don't own a computer, Mr. Edgeworth."

"Oh very well, let's go to my office. We can use my computer there, but you're paying for the taxi fare, since my car's still in the auto shop."

"Haha, funny story about that too, sir..."

"...You can't be serious."

_**Current status of Team Edge-Shoe: Broke **_

_**Meanwhile, thousands of miles away....**_

"Hmph! I don't need any help to win this game! I am a Von Karma! It is in my genes to dominate all inferior beings!"

That certain outburst caused heads to turn and glares were directed at the young Prosecutor. However, she did not pay any attention to this. The young woman was too busy concentrating on concocting a plan that would ensure victory for herself and demise for her most hated rival: Phoenix Wright.

"Hm, that little girl said that the competition had a time limit if it took too long, but perfection does not need a deadline. After all, a week is nothing. With my brilliance, I will bring that overgrown porcupine down to his knees! All I have to do is provoke him psychologically...but how?"

Putting her finger over her lips, she thought long and hard about any options that might yield the wanted results. At long last, she settled upon one: Subliminal messaging.

"Perfect! The government invests billions of dollars on this kind of ingenious advertisement method! If it can work on millions of people, then it will have no trouble conquering one man. All I need is money, which I have, and subtlety, which I was born with."

Laughing to herself, Franziska arrived at her mansion and went inside to set her plan in motion. What she had forgotten about herself was that, one, Franziska had the subtlety of a hyperactive three-year-old on sugar pills, and two, her family fortune was inaccessible to her due to her spending her royalty checks on whip polish and blue hair dye.

_**Current status of Team Karma: Clueless**_

_**Meanwhile, thousands of miles away...**_

"ACHOO! ACHOO! ACHOO!"

"Hey Nick, cut it out! You're making me lose concentration. I only need four more combos until I beat the final boss!"

"Um, sorry..." _Wait, where'd you get that game anyways?_

"I borrowed your credit card so I could buy the latest Steel Samurai video game, if that's what you're wondering."

"WHAT?" _I can barely afford the groceries!_

"Oh calm down! If you win the game, you get a cash prize...of sorts."

"Cash prize? From who?"

"Me, silly! I need something to motivate you guys!"

"Wait a minute..."

**HOLD IT!**

"You never mentioned a cash prize before!"

"Well, I needed to take your credit card first, or else I might've ended up lying to all of you."

_You're using my credit card as a prize!? I thought you said that the money was coming from you!_

"Oh, and by the way Nick, it seems that your card's almost at its limit, but don't worry, I emailed all the participants about this."

_...Why does this feel like a sort of blackmail now? Oh right, because now I have to win this stupid game or else someone's gonna go on a shopping spree with my money._

"The winner gets to use your card and buy whatever they want for an hour. Of course, you'll have to go along with the winner since you're paying if you lose. Good luck, Nick!"

_Dear Lord, why have you abandoned me?_

_**Current status of Team Phoenix: Depressed**_

_**6 days and 23 hours until the end**_

**Looks like Phoenix finally has a logical reason to win! And before you say it, yeah, I know. This chapter isn't as funny as the first one, but it's setting up everything. I'll do my best to bring some laughs, so don't go anywhere! **


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N So hey guys. It's been a while, I guess. Been a bit busy lately, what with all the studying, projects, reading, and gaming, I kinda neglected this. Not worry! Here's a chapter just for you guys!...oh wait, on second thought, worry. -_-**

**Disclaimer: Not mine. Nuff said.**

"_Mamma Mia!"_ A comical voice with a heavy Italian accent could be heard as the character in the game fell into a seemingly endless pit. Gumshoe's face of concentration turned into frustration as he grabbed his hand and shouted out informal words.

"Argh! That was my last life! Stupid flying koopa, always comes ofnowhere and scares me!"

"DETECTIVE! WHAT IN THE WORLD DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!?" roared the furious attorney.

Jumping up and hurriedly closing the guilty window on the laptop, he bounded off the chair and tried to pull an innocent look. (in which he failed miserably)

"M-me? I was just uh....studying turtle anatomy?"

These days, Gumshoe swore that the dent in Edgeworth's forehead matched the mark on his palms.

Sighing, Edgeworth made his way over to his desk and gave the detective a withering glare.

"Oh really? Whatever happened to the brilliant plan about finding more information about this game?"

"I was doing field work on games! Honest to God!"

"You're religious?"

"I'm what now?"

"...Never mind."

Turning back to the monitor and opening up another browser, he immediately went to a search engine to scavenge for anything crucial about the game. Beside him, Gumshoe shuffled his feet uncomfortably while checking his watch.

"Sir, don't you have a case to prepare for? Why don't you let me do this? I promise I won't let you down."

"Gumshoe, learn to prioritize!"

"But, it's a murder trial involving a very important political leader."

"Screw politics, I have a game to win!" Edgeworth cried out vehemently.

Gumshoe gasped, but quickly recovered. Shaking his head, he quietly thought to himself.

_Man, is this game so important?_

Unbeknownst to the detective, Edgeworth had no clue on how to look for information. After all, he was an attorney, and usually the "Examine" button would get him out of tight spots. But seeing as that there was nothing to help him, he accidentally found

From there, things sort of went downhill.

"Gumshoe, who's this Pico character?"

_**Current Progress of Team Edge-Shoe: If possible, somewhere in the realm of negatives**_

_**Meanwhile, thousands of miles away...**_

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN I'M BROKE!?"

"Ma'am, I suggest that you lower your voice and act in a civilized manner before I ask for security."

"What did you do with my fortune!?"

Sighing, the man at the counter regurgitated the facts to Ms. Von Karma about her current financial crisis for about the hundredth time.

"Miss, I have it all here. You withdrew your savings about three weeks ago. You did not leave a single penny in your account. What you did with it is no concern of ours, for our bank only exists to store your money in a safe place."

Sweating profusely and leaning over the counter to glare at the poor man, she banged her fist on the counter and spat out, "Give. Me. My. Money."

The employee widened his eyes, immediately thinking robbery, when in fact Von Karma was just going through her Von Karma cycle of life. Obviously, the man had no idea since he had never played Phoenix Wright before, so he alerted security to restrain the questionably insane woman. With that, he rushed off to call the police. During all of this, Franziska's temper was probably two times more explosive than Mount Vesuvius, what with her shouting incoherent words at the trembling workers and wielding her notorious whip in every direction.

And for no reason, Von Karma blamed Phoenix.

"Curse that pathetic excuse of a lawyer!"

_**Status of Team Karma: Arrested**_

_**Meanwhile, thousands of miles away...(getting old yet? :p)**_

"ACHOO!"

"Get a Kleenex already!"

_I've been sneezing a lot lately..._

Reaching for a tissue, Phoenix stole a glance at the clock. To his delight, work was "theoretically" over in about ten minutes. Phoenix sighed to himself. After all, every day passed by without any excitement.

No wait, that isn't right. What Phoenix wanted wasn't a fully charged day, but more of a normal business day. He was an ordinary man, but he was surrounded by....extraordinary people. Take Edgeworth for example. His old friend was known for being stiff, business-like, and slight outdated. Next thing Phoenix knew, Edgeworth's facebook profile was crammed with pictures of Madness Combat. Even Von Karma was affecting him today, even though she had yet to do something. For example, Phoenix swore that he heard her scream about an hour ago, but it was probably just his paranoia.

Sighing, he turned off his computer and got ready to leave. Glancing over at the other side of the room, he saw Maya still playing(_Where does she get all those games?)_on the Xbox. He walked over to her, tapping her on the shoulder.

"Hey Maya, time to close up."

"No way, man"

_What are you, a hippie now?_

"Yes way, Maya. I can't lock the door if you're still in here."

"Dude...Halo."

"I can't leave you here for the whole night, now can I?"

_Wait a minute..._

"...I guess you're right, Nick."

_Drat!_

With a final longing look at the television screen, she signed off of Xbox Live, not before hearing several angry comments such as "what the heck are you doing, you noob!?" and "Get in the ****ing warthog!", causing Phoenix to raise his eyebrows. She got up from the couch and stood up to face Nick with a very suspicious look.

"Hey Nick..."

Phoenix, not really paying attention to Maya as he got his coat and keys, instantly replied,

"Yeah?"

"PREPARATION TIME!"

The sudden shout made Phoenix jump about a foot in the air, making his hair stand even more on end than it usually was. Once he recovered, he swivelled around to look at the spirit medium with an angry and confused face.

"What are you talking about!? And secondly, don't scream like that! We're not the only ones in this building, you know!"

This did not deter Maya's grin, adding to Phoenix's curiosity. Speaking in a slow voice, as if talking to someone younger than her,(ironic, no?) she asked,

"What do you think we're gonna do? I'm gonna help you win this game!"

"What?"

_You're the referee!_

"C'mon! Let's go get a hamburger and talk about it! You're treating though!"

If inanimate objects had emotions, the poor lawyer's wallet would have been bursting into tears right about now.

_**Status of Team Phoenix: Possible victim of loan sharks in the future**_

_**Meanwhile, thousands of miles-what the heck, you know the drill**_

The security guard looked at the new arriver with wide eyes and an open mouth. After a minute of silence, the security guard recovered and asked,

"Um, shouldn't you be on the other side of the Detention Center, Ms. Von Karma?

A glare ugly and horrifying enough to turn Medusa to stone silenced the man.

_**6 days and 15 hours until the end**_

**How was that, guys!? Totally, awesome, right?...no? Okay. =p Anyways, rate and review! Next chapter's coming up soon, I promise.**

**You know what, I should bump the rating up to K+...**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N WE'RE BACK! Well actually, it's just me, but I've always wanted to say that...hehe!^^ Anyways, here's the new chapter! Guess I don't have to tell you guys that I welcome your reviews with open arms! Why? Because I love you all! PEACE~!**

"Sir, it's been hours..."

"Absolutely not. There's a flame war going on in another forum. With my superior inteleect, I will quash the ignorance out of this place!"

"Sir, some of them are just kids..."

"Stfu, Gumshoe!"

Widening his eyes in horror to the fact that Edgeworth had already progressed to the stage of using internet slang in real life, his mind froze and pitied the fallen hero. Trying his best to salvage the remains of the once gramatically correct attorney, Gumshoe tried diverting his attention by bringing up the contest...again.

"But sir, if this goes on, you'll end up losing! Think about it! Right now, Von Karma might be waiting right outside the office window!"

Irritated by the persistence of the unofficial hobo, he snapped at him,

"Detective, just because you enter rooms through windows does not mean that it applies to others. And when I mean others, I mean people with an IQ above 25."

Oh, snap!

"...But windows are what helps people get in."

"There's a miraculous invention called a door. Go marvel at its ingenious design over there." _So I can't see you. _Edgeworth added in his mind.

"WHAT!? Why doesn't my apartment have one??"

Usually, Edgeworth would have mentally and physically facepalmed at the degree of the detective's stupidity, but it was Madness Combat Day on NG, and therefore the madness called him.

"But seriously sir, we need a plan. Any plan will work!"

Unable to tolerate any more of it, the engrossed prosecutor shouted out,

"Find some recruits to keep guard, and one with quick reflexes! It is a fact that if one makes a victim says the game before the attacker, the tables will be reversed. Now, find someone with a quick tongue and leave me alone!"

The expression on the sullen man instantly changed from one of desperation to one of euphoria. He straightened his shoulders, and saluted the lawyer...before jumping the window to fulfill his task.

Once he left, Edgeworth swivelled in his chair and turned to look out the window. Grumbling to himself, he muttered something about _five storey building_ and _superhobo_.

_**Status of Team Edge-Shoe: Actual progress for once in the story!**_

_**Meanwhile, thousands of kilometers away, eh...**_

"Alright, you're free to go, Miss. I'm glad that it was all a misunderstanding!"

"Of course, you foolish fool! My family is known for a perfect record, whether they be court records or crime records!" (A/N If you can find the contradiction in this, I'll give you a cookie.)

The police officer just sweat dropped and proceeded to open the door for the haughty whip-wielder. Upon exiting her dungeon, Franziska set her mind immediately back to the contest.

_Hmmm, how to go about this? Money is out of the question, so what can I do? Phoenix always wins, and he can hardly afford the shirt off his back! How does he do it?..._

Suddenly, a smaller version of Franziska poofed onto the real Franziska's right shoulder. There wasn't a big difference between the two, except for the noticeable difference in height, leathery wings, and the trident. In other words, the dark side of Franziska had been personified, and to think that Franziska could not be any darker. The two turned to look at each other, and the miniature devil squeaked,

"I propose that you screw the rules and bombard the insignificant bugs with your traps. Remember, there is no certain victory without breaking past the limitations! Besides, it's not as if that ditz of a spirit medium would be able to tell the difference between playing fair and cheating. Heck, she probably couldn't even tell the difference between a hot dog and a dog (I know, stupid comparison)!"

Expecting the angel to appear, Franziska turned to her left shoulder, but the only presence that met her was the presence of air. Confused, she turned back to the devil.

"Hey, where's the other guy?"

MEANWHILE

"Stupid traffic!" In the angel's frustration, he knocked over his Mcdonald's coffee cup full of decaf, which only served to heighten his temper.

"Aw great, that's JUST great!"

_**Status of Team Karma: Possibly influenced by Family Guy?**_

_**Meanwhile, hundreds of mols away...**_

"Nick! Pay attention to the blackboard!

_We're in Burger King, for Pete's sake! How did you manage to get that?_

"PAY ATTENTION!"

Snapping out of his inner monologue, Phoenix proceeded to focus his attention on the board conjured from seemingly nowhere. Maya, in a referee uniform, got out her laser pointer and stabbed the ray of light at the writing on the board. With a serious face, she stated the psychological nature of humans and how to provoke or awaken the memories of a certain topic through subtle methods. Of course, Phoenix was no genius at this; moreover, he was barely a lawyer. But that aside, the man had to focus on the here and now. Writing down notes on his napkin, he tried his very best to absorb the stuff that was written on the board. Attempting to look like an educated scholar, Maya pointed her laser pointer at Phoenix and asked

"Now that you have the theory down, ready to test it out?"

"W-what? How?"

Maya rolled her eyes.

"Test it on me. I'll be your first opponent. Pretend that the thirty-minute thing doesn't apply right now, kay?"

The man could do nothing but shake his head. Slapping his face, he took a deep breath, mustering up his willpower to win, while at the same time summoning his ability to find a way through any obstacle that faced him. With this power he would surely-

"The game."

_Dammit!_

"Wait a minute, that's not fair!" Phoenix began to protest.

BONK!

Maya had hit Nick with a rolled up newspaper.

"Enemies won't wait for you to get ready."

"Fine...let's start-THE GAME!" Phoenix shouted out in mid-speech.

However, right before the deadly words came out of his mouth, Maya calmly said, "Pause."

_Huh? You can do that?_

"Defense tactic number one. Pause. Allows you to negate the effects of thinking about the game or to defend an attack from another player. Remember to use that when the time comes around. Got it?"

_YOU should be playing this game then!_

"But, you need more challenges. Go up to the counter and beat the employee."

"WHAT!? That's stupid!"

"Do you want to win or not??"

_Do I even have a choice!?_

With a reluctant sigh, he trotted off over to the counter. At the register was a young woman with long black hair tied into two long braids. Her dark eyes complemented her hair, and although there was not a trace of make-up, her face was undeniably flawless. Sporting the mandatory uniform, her nametag spelled out Iris. Baffled by her beauty, Phoenix felt like it was court all over again.

Iris gave the unfortunate man a heart-warming smile, and said "Welcome to Burger King. May I take your order?"

"Y-yeah..um...uh...I..you see...uh..that is..that g-girl told me to...uh..oh geez...t-the game!" Feeling like the most idiotic person in the world, Phoenix just hung his head in shame.

Iris gave Phoenix a look of confusion, but understanding suddenly dawned on her face, and she giggled. "What was that? I mean, that was the weirdest way of asking someone out!"

_Wait, what!?_

Her fit of giggles soon burst into laughters. Trying to hold back tears, she choked out the words "With a funny and cute guy like you, sure!"

_No, you've got the wrong idea!_ _NOOOOOO!_

Five minutes later, Phoenix had obtained the email of the still laughing employee, and with a blank look, staggered back to where Maya was sitting. Maya looked up, and then flashed him an oblivious smile. "So, how'd it go?"

Her question was met with a napkin to the face.

_**Status of Team Phoenix: Currently out to date (HAR HAR I'm a riot. XP)**_

_**6 days and 13 hours until the end**_

**Well, hope you liked it! Please feel free to comment. I mean, anything! Seriously, the road to perfection can't be achieved without help from outside. By the way, just to make things clear, I make EVERYTHING up on the go, so don't expect something epic like the Star Wars Original Trilogy. I'm strictly unprofessional, thank you very much. R&R, or I'll murder you in your sleep. =)**


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